I know I'm opening a great can of worms posting this, men of a certain age nodding sagely and feminists up in arms against me. So where do I stand on the thorny issue of spanking and feminism? I don't need to describe myself as a liberated woman as I'm lucky enough that, as an educated single female who is financially, socially and intellectually independent there has never been anything I ever needed to be liberated from. A feminist? Something I don’t tend to think about, but of it means strongly believing that women are entitled to the same advantages as men in education, in the workplace, and in the home then I am. I like men to be strong and self reliant, but I can spot a bully or a Neanderthal a mile of and won’t let such people into my life. As such, I am in complete charge of my life and that has to include my sexual fantasies, and if those fantasies happen to include my sometimes being a naughty girl who needs a good smacked bottom from time to time, it is my own decision; if I have organized my life so that actually happens, it means I'm very fortunate indeed.
Having a fantasy that you can actually live out means having an additional and exciting element spicing up your sex life, and that has to be a good thing. Overwhelming it does not mean being a victim or a drudge. Certainly in my case I can say that just about every time a man has spanked me I was the person who instigated it, even if only by a flash of the eyes at the right time and in the right way. We girls are past masters at letting our male companions know when an invitation to come in for a coffee could easily lead to a sybaritic breakfast in bed some eight hours later, and it’s the same with other game playing.
Some of
you might remember that a few years ago there was a tabloid scandal about Max
Mosley the wealthy and powerful head of motor racing who was discovered in a
specialist club being whipped and dominated by a handful of sexualised females.
Unsurprisingly there was a lot of prurient
tutting about this, but no one for a second suggested that the poor chap was a
victim of those girls wielding the whip. If I may say so, he was more of a
victim than I have ever been as he paid out lots of money for this service, but never once has a
boyfriend of mine between pulling me across his knee and taking down my panties
asked me just how much I was going to pay him for the pleasure .
In summary, where is a women’s place? It's anywhere she chooses it to be, and if when she’s in the mood it happens to be bare bottomed across a man's knee because it makes both her and him happy and horny, then that sounds a good place to be.
Very interesting and good points Elizabeth.
ReplyDeleteThe feminist organization over here has outlived any useful purpose that it once had.
It has been taken over by militant man haters bent on advancing their political and social agenda. Many who believe that there is no such thing as consentual sex between men and women, it is rape. This just an example of their ideas.
I want no part of it all as it has become.
What it used to stand for that used to be benificial, was the advancement of equality in employment opportunities and wages, education, etc and which the orginazition played a huge role in achieving here. After all, we have a woman that has a chance of becoming president. Something absolutely unthinkable when the feminist movement began. Those goals have become "incidental" to their agenda now.
I do not consider myself a feminist by the standard that "feminist" has become. I did not leave feminism, the feminist movement left me.
All that I do, I am in control of. I am "submissive" sexually with my boyfriend by desire and choice. I am spanked because I love it and because I let my boyfriend spank me. I am not oppressed and abused and discriminated against. I am getting everything I want... If that is not empowerment, I do not know what is.
Feminists, by the original ideals and goals of the feminist movement would and should be PROUD of women like you, me, and your female readers who are in touch with and comfortable in their sexuality to be bold and empowered enough to be spanked and or engage in other BDSM activity because that is what they want and need and are absolutely consentual participants.
Feminist leaders TODAY, would call us victims and too stupid to realize we are being victimized and oppressed.
Feminism, as it was meant to be has absolutely no contradiction in principles with women being in psychosexually and/or physiosexually(if that is a word) submissive relationships with 100% mutual consentuality (if THAT is a word...good thing I teach math and not English, eh!!!)
amber
Very little that I can add to that, Amber. Well said. Will be interested in any follow up comments though, my loyal regulars apart, few people who read this blog ever bother to comment.
ReplyDeleteLiz
I apologize for being just a lurker. Amber's reply made me delurk. Thank you for validating what we do in a very well thought out essay, Amber.
ReplyDeleteFor ever after I will think of you as Liza the Lurker!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment and hope you go on enjoying the blog and of course, people's comments!
Liz
For ever after I will think of you as Liza the Lurker!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment and hope you go on enjoying the blog and of course, people's comments!
Liz
Since spring is a long way off here, I just returned from a skiing trip, I will comment on this post. One sentence really caught my attention. Having a fantasy you can actually live out is something that is very important for having a balanced sex life. I feel very lucky I am able to live out a couple of my fantasies, spanking and a same sex relationship. I would think it could be frustrating if one could only dream about what they would like to be doing sexually.
ReplyDeleteI'm not much of a feminist, I am on the bandwagon for equal pay for equal work, right to have abortions and other basic rights I feel all people should have no matter where they live in the world.
Barbee
Thank you for that, Liza.
ReplyDeleteYou don't need to stay lurking. As you can see, Liz appreciates your comments.
amber
Thanks for your contribution Barbee. Glad I opened this can of worms!
ReplyDeleteLiz